To celebrate the year's most glorious 24 hours on television, here's the Top 24 Quotes of the most amazing Christmas movie ever made: "A Christmas Story"...1. Daddy's gonna kill Ralphie!
2. Frah-gee-lay. It must be Italian.
3. Be sure to drink your Ovaltine. Ovaltine? A crummy commercial? Son of a bitch!
4. I can't put my arms down!
5. That's ridiculous. Jealous. Jealous of WHAT? That is... The ugliest lamp I have ever seen in my entire LIFE!
6. My little brother had not eaten voluntarily in over three years.
7. You used up all the glue on purpose!
8. Randy lay there like a slug! It was his only defense!
9. I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!
10. Oh! The theme I've been waiting for all my life! Listen to this sentence: "A Red Ryder BB gun with a compass in the stock and this thing that tells time." Poetry... Sheer poetry, Ralph! An A+!
11. Getting ready to go to school was like getting ready for extended deep-sea diving.
12. Football? Football? What's a football? With unconscious will my voice squeaked out 'football'.
13. C+! Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! C+!
14. You'll shoot your eye out, kid.
15. He looks like a pink nightmare!
16. Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf.
17. Schwartz created a slight breach of etiquette by skipping the triple dare and going right for the throat!
11. Getting ready to go to school was like getting ready for extended deep-sea diving.
12. Football? Football? What's a football? With unconscious will my voice squeaked out 'football'.
13. C+! Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! C+!
14. You'll shoot your eye out, kid.
15. He looks like a pink nightmare!
16. Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf.
17. Schwartz created a slight breach of etiquette by skipping the triple dare and going right for the throat!
18. With as much dignity as he could muster, the Old Man gathered up the sad remains of his shattered Major Award. Later that night, alone in the backyard, he buried it next to the garage.
Now I could never be sure, but I thought that I heard the sound of "Taps" being played. Gently.
19. Aunt Clara had for years labored under the delusion that I was not only perpetually 4 years old, but also a girl.
20. Was there no end to the conspiracy of irrational prejudice against Red Ryder and his peacemaker?
21. Deck the harrs with boughs of horry, ra ra ra ra ra, ra ra ra ra.
22. Over the years I got to be quite a connoisseur of soap. My personal preference was for Lux, but I found Palmolive had a nice, piquant after-dinner flavor - heavy, but with just a touch of mellow smoothness. Life Buoy, on the other hand...
23. My father worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium. A master.
24. I like The Wizard of Oz. I like the Tin Man.
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